A Rambling Bit About Faith

     Well, today I thought I'd talk a bit about faith.  Faith has always been difficult for me.  I know I should have faith, but I struggle with it every day.  I pray, not every day, but most days, before bed, and sometimes in the morning, but I really should pray more, and trust more that The Lord really will guild and protect me.  I know the adage the He never gives you anything you can't handle, but sometimes I really wish He didn't have such a high opinion of my ability to cope with stuff.  I see people, people who are happy, laughing together, having fun, and I get so jealous of them.  It has been a really long time since I have been happy much.  So I pray to Him for help, guidance, with everything from my finances, to relationships, and even to help me be a better person, (I also pray that He bless and guide all my family and friends around the world), but it just seems like things continue to slide down hill and go from bad to worse.... Still I try to have faith.  Faith, that He has a plan, even a plan for me, and this is just a tiny piece of that plan, and He will bring me out the other side of my troubles a stronger, better person for having been through tough times.  But it is harder than I would have ever imagined .... It is so hard to just let go of the worry, and put all of it into God's hand, and say I trust You, Lord to take care of this, and guide me to a better place ... It is something I try to work on every day, <sigh> but I think I fail more often than not.  I have had more reason to have faith than many, (including some excellent friends from out west),  but many times I see more hopelessness than I do hope.  But life without faith, is like two slices of bread with nothing in between to really sink your teeth into and fill your mouth with flavor (wow that is a really bad analogy .... LOL)  ok, so I just reread this and realized most of it is about my lack of faith as opposed to having faith, or even describing faith, which was my original intent, but maybe this is a better post really?  I don't know .... I think I am beginning to ramble, a sure sign that what ever I needed to say has been said.  I don't know how you (whoever you may be) feel about it, but for me, I think I will continue to try and let go of my will, and try to have faith in His will.




Vitam Libertatem Honerem